1. I bought a big piece of cake and I went to the movies by myself

    (via memory-hole)


  2. (via jsudeikis)


  3. awesomepeoplehangingouttogether:

    Tina Fey & Carol Burnett

    I think the world just stopped from all the awesomeness in this photo.



  5. I never dreamed I would receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, mostly because my style is so typically Austrian. I never thought I would even qualify for the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. I mean, Maybe the Nathanial Hawthorne prize for judgmental nature. Or the Judy Blume award for awkward puberty. Or the Harper Lee prize for small bodies of work - but never this. And yet I hope that like Mark Twain, a hundred years from now, people will see my work and think, “Wow, that is actually pretty racist”.